Respect 2006 or the State of the Forums

I don't know why I find myself having to address this issue at least once a year. Apparently people think these forums are a free-for-all where they can post as they please. Guess what? These are not public forums, we do have rules! Read on and comment please!


A number of us have been holding a discussion in Flamers Paradise in a topic named “Just tbh… It’s a Disaster” about what I’m going to call The State of the Forums. It’s also being discussed in the Mods Haven. If you haven’t at least read the topic in Flamers, I ask that you read it and consider what is being said there. If it makes you angry, then maybe someone’s words hit close to home. If you find yourself agreeing there’s a problem, then understand that it’s the whole group that has to make the effort to change things and that it’s not up to a couple people, or just the Mods or just the Admins, but everyone who posts here.

The issue that has been raised is about the negativity here on the MM forums, and as we’ve been discussing, we’ve also raised the issue about the lack of respect on these forums. It may be a case where people are just so certain that their solutions for the team would actually work that they forget why MM exists. MM is a place for Milan fans world-wide to share not only their enthusiasm but also their OPINIONS. What everyone here needs to remember is that no opinion is more correct than any other opinion. So what it boils down to is, if someone says so and so had a good game, if someone else disagrees, we don’t need to see a post saying “you suck, you don’t know what you are talking about” or “You’re an idiot, you don’t know anything.” It’s called play the ball, not the man—if you disagree, simply say “I disagree with what you said” and then constructively list your reasons. No one gets hurt or angry and you’ve had your say. There’s no need for personal attacks. Being rude to other fans doesn’t make you a better fan, nor does it make your opinion more important or “better” than anyone else’s, and it doesn’t show that you know more than anyone else. All it does is prove you are rude!

The truth is, when I (and others) observe people being rude, my initial reaction is to think that we’re dealing with bored 13 year olds who simply don’t know how to act online. If you are indeed very young and this is your first experience in an online community, then you need to understand right now that just because you are sitting at a computer doesn’t mean you forget your manners, it doesn’t mean you have the freedom to be rude and obnoxious, and it does not give you license to cause trouble. If you are posting a nasty reply to someone, you need to stop and ask yourself ”would I want someone to talk to me face to face like that, and if they did, would I like it?” If the answer is no, then you need to re-write your post or not reply at all.

If you are NOT a teenager, and this is not your first experience in an online community, but you’re wondering if maybe you’ve been posting in the rude manner I’m referring to…then maybe it’s time to stop and re-read your posts before you click submit. If what you have written would make you angry if it was addressed TO you, then don’t post it.

I have a feeling a portion of what is being considered a negative attitude here is tied right into the rudeness that’s running rampant on the forums. Stop being rude! Every poster here deserves respect. If you don’t like an opinion, post a constructive response. If you’re tired of reading a certain type of topic, then just ignore those topics. No one has to post in every topic here.

And while I’m talking about posting, there are a couple things we need to remind everyone about:
PLEASE take a moment to look in a couple sub-forums to see if there is already a similar topic. We don’t need 100 topics asking “what do you think of this lineup” when all it contains is yet another dream team listing. Our profiles allow us to announce to the world who our favorite players are, so you don’t need to tell us every week in another fake lineup. We can and will either delete multiple threads on the same topic or we’ll merge them. Ditto discussions on transfers, injuries, games, etc.

ANYTHING you are posting as NEWS absolutely MUST include the URL of the source. No vague “I saw this posted” or “I just found this” things with some so-called “report”—give us the source to look at or just don’t post it. There’s a number of “news” sites that really are just gossip or rumor mills and it helps to know right off the bat if what’s being posted comes from a place like that. People want serious discussion, so give us something to back it up with!

Sometimes a one-line response is enough or is all someone can think of. If that’s the case tho, use some common sense and DO NOT quote an entire post that is many, many paragraphs long. You can delete most of a quotes reply—just highlight and hit delete. It’s OK, no one will be offended and that way you can highlight exactly what your one-liner is referring to!

Avatars, oh yes, once again we have to mention avatars. Being able to have an avatar is not a right, it’s a privilege, something that the bulletin board system can be set up to let users have to personalize their presence on the forums. We’ve had 2 complaints about offensive avatars in less than 3 weeks. Forum rules cover avatars—nothing rude, nothing offensive, and nothing political. We’re a world-wide forum with a lot of different cultures and values represented. If avatars are going to become an on-going issue, we can easily do away with them. Best advice about avatars—stick to something related to AC Milan.

Personal profiles have apparently become an issue as well. These forums are apolitical in their philosophy. They were not created to be a battlefield, but more an escape of sorts, and a place where people of all cultures can mingle and be UNITED BY A SINGLE BOND. That bond is AC Milan, in case you’ve forgotten, and the simple fact that people from all over the globe can support the same team should speak louder than almost anything else. We will not be drawn into asking people to change their location that is listed in their profile. It’s entirely possible that everyone here can learn something, even tolerance, from being a member of these forums.